The parent-teacher relationship is essential for the academic success of students—and often for their social success in a school setting. It is said that it takes a village to raise a child and this sentiment holds true even though we no longer live in villages and tribes. When parents, caregivers and teachers are all on the same page about a student’s progress and development, it can have compounding positive effects by providing consistency and reinforcing lessons at home and at school.

However, effective communication between parents and teachers is not always natural or easy. Misunderstandings and a lack of information are common even when teachers and parents are trying their best to keep in touch. We lead busy lives and have a lot of demands on our time and attention. Sometimes things slip through the cracks unintentionally, while in other situations a parent might not understand the full picture or gravity of a situation. In either case, it is important for educators to keep the well-being of their students in mind and be persistent and intentional in their communication with parents.

Here are 10 tips for talking to parents and caregivers about their children’s behavior and academic performance in school.

  1. Establish consistency. Let parents know when they can and should expect to hear from you. Whether you send out emails at the end of the week or hold “office hours” during certain times of the day, establish a consistent communication schedule so that parents are expecting the information and can plan accordingly.
    Schedule conversations. Even if you have been rehearsing an important conversation in your head and feel prepared, don’t bring up the topic on the spur of the moment (such as when the parent is picking up or dropping off their child). Instead, schedule a time for the conversation, either in person or over the phone, so that you and the parents have time to adequately prepare.
  2. Assume positivity and curiosity. When approaching sensitive topics with the parents or guardians of your students, assume the best and try to be curious instead of critical. Give the benefit of the doubt and try to see how “problem” behavior could be an indicator of certain strengths or skills. Try to ask open-ended questions and be curious to learn more about the context for the student’s behavior, instead of making statements and assuming you understand the situation fully.
  3. Show examples. If you are talking with a parent about their student’s performance in class, make sure you have examples of their work to share. This will help provide objective examples and may prevent parents from getting defensive or making excuses for a student who is struggling.
  4. Create FAQs. Create written or video answers to frequently asked questions from students. This will save you from answering the same question from multiple students or parents. If one person has a question about something, it is likely that others will as well, so try to anticipate this and proactively answer questions.
  5. Make sure you are well-resourced. If you’re feeling tired, overwhelmed or frustrated going into a conversation with a parent, your emotions may impact the way you explain a situation and could cause parents to feel defensive or frustrated themselves. Check in with yourself prior to the conversation and see if there is a way to calm your nervous system and resource yourself so that you can speak clearly and objectively.
  6. Employ some empathy. There may be situations that you can’t “fix” right away but could benefit from empathy. Whether you’re wanting to strengthen your relationship with a parent or collaborate more effectively with them, simply hearing out their concerns and frustrations can help everyone feel like they are on the same team.
  7. Maintain confidentiality. It is important to respect the privacy of your students and their families. When speaking about an issue that involves two or more students, do not name the other students involved unless you have permission from them and their parents. It is also a good idea to refrain from talking about a student’s personal life with other teachers or school staff.
  8. Ask for feedback. How do parents feel about your level of communication? Try asking for feedback on your communication style and frequency—perhaps sending out an anonymous survey so that parents can freely give their opinion.
  9. Give yourself breaks. If you find yourself on video calls or using the computer for a large portion of your work day, try taking a break from screens once you’re off work. By setting healthy boundaries in your work life, you will be able to more fully give yourself to your students and their families when you’re on the clock.

TeachPar is the online platform that keeps teachers organized, parents informed, and students on track. With a modern, intuitive, responsive interface, TeachPar seamlessly connects parents and teachers for improved student learning and better organization.